I LOVE THIS GUY!!!! When I read the title I was upset, because I am still very chivalrous, but once I read it; he is spot on.
In the past couple of years, I have been on over a hundred dates. [This may be why I am always tired, and broke. haha] On these dates, I cannot remember how many women have told me that I am the first person to ever give them flowers. WHAT!?!?!? How is a woman over the age of 27 and NEVER been given flowers? And I always give them in her favorite color, to show I paid attention. I've had a few cry, which really touched me, and made me feel good that I touched them that way. However, flowers on a first date shouldn't be that touching, it should be a norm.
I always pay for the first date unless the woman really puts up a fight. If you are an independent woman, I do not want to muscle in on that. haha Again, the women are often surprised. And I feel like they shouldn't be.
Let's be honest, I have the skill set that I can go to a bar, work my magic, and go back to her place. But, that's not what I want. Five years ago I would say, "SURE! Sign me up!" But now, I want romance. And although one of my best girlfriends ever started from a bout of Birthday Sex; I want the old fashioned courting, and when I find the right woman I am more than ready to settle down. [Please let it be Nina!!!!]
I get bored on so many dates now. And I think there are a couple of reasons for this. First, I've been on WAY TOO MANY dates. That's why for the past 6 months I've kind of been on a hiatus save for a few lovely ladies. But a lot of it has to do with my date's conversation skills are dead. And these are REALLY smart women (for those who do not know, I normally date lawyers, or someone high up a corporate ladder) I remember when a first date was exciting, and you wanted to know more, and more, and more about the other person. Now, I get vapid conversation, and what seems like insecurity when delving to get to know them more. And I get that. They are insecure opening up like that, because we have lost the art of the date. Women aren't used to guys wanting to get to know them, so their first date muscle has not been exercised. This saddens me. I have had first dates with women where I wanted to say, "Ok, this date is over. Now let me talk to you about a woman's worth, because you obviously don't get it. And that is our fault as men for not showing that to you", and then lecture her on the art of dating.
This isn't women's fault (although it would be REALLY easy to lay the blame on them). Ladies, if you let a guy smash with minimal effort, then you are going to get minimal effort. And I get the reasoning of "Well there are more women than men in NY so if I require more effort, he will just go for someone else", but that is flawed. Because a guy that is actually looking for a relationship will put in that extra effort if you require him to. STOP SELLING YOURSELF SHORT! And guys, stop thinking with your little brains. I KNOW it is hard. It is one of the toughest things I have ever done in my life, but it is worth it. When you use the brain atop your neck, life gets better. When you think with the one below your belt; not so great. Up your game guys. It's time to show women how much we appreciate them. 2014 can be the year of Chivalry!
Thanks Danni Pirone for sharing!